Legal Team Denies Trump Isn’t Not Under non-Investigation

Trump Lawyer Speaks About Investigation

The Washington Post recently reported that President Trump officially under investigation for possible Obstruction of Justice in relation the the FBI’s probe on Russian hacking of the 2016 election.  President Trump confirmed this on Twitter the day after this story broke.  In new developments today, grammar experts are relatively sure that Trump’s legal team has confirmed this assessment as well.

Trump’s top legal counsel, Irving Kanarek spoke with the media Sunday to make the following statement:



“The Washington Post has reported that the President of the United States is under criminal investigation.  As his personal legal counsel, I would like to declare unequivocally that President Trump is certainly not being non-investigated by Special Counsel Mueller.  The President hasn’t not received notification that he isn’t not suspected of any crime.  Anyone reporting otherwise is a blatant liar, falsifying the facts.”

Immediately following this statement, a Washington reporter interjected to ask, “Mr. Kanarek, I think that was a quadruple negative.  Can you please clarify:  Is President Trump under criminal investigation or not?”

Kanarek responded, “Correct.  And that’s what I am trying to make clear to the American people.”

The reporter, puzzled, added, “Sir, we don’t understand.  So, President Trump is under investigation?”

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Kanarek replied angrily, “Why are you trying to twist the White House’s words?  That isn’t not what I didn’t fail to say!  I told you already, President Trump isn’t not the subject of a criminal investigation.  Nobody in the special counsel’s team has failed to not advise him otherwise!”

The reporter, in deep thought, pondered the details of this statement, responding. “So, if he isn’t NOT a subject to a criminal investigation, then the second negative cancels out the first — No, that isn’t right. Wait.”

Kanarek interrupted the reporter, “This is ridiculous.  I have never seen such a dishonest media who work so hard to cloud the facts and make controversy where there should be none.  I don’t know how to be more clear about this, sir.  This meeting is over.”

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NewsWerthy has analyzed this statement thoroughly and concluded that Kanarek’s statement actually does confirm the Special Counsel has informed Trump he’s under investigation.  However, it’s unclear whether Kanarek was truly trying to convey that message or not.  Hopefully, the White House can clear up this matter soon.

 

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