China Trade War: Trump Sanctions P.F. Chang’s

Trump Sanctions PF Changs

Tensions are escalating as the United States and the People’s Republic of China continue to trade volleys of economic attacks on one another.  What began with an exchange of trade tariffs has now taken a very bizarre turn.  It seems that Trump’s next move in the China trade war will be to sanction the infamous restaurant chain P.F. Chang’s — a wholly American company.

The White House communications team released a memo from the President explaining this action.  A full copy of the memo can be read below.

Press Release:

White House – Oval Office
July 9th, 2018
7:22AM EDT

Statement for public release:

My fellow Americans,

For decades, China has benefited from unbalanced and unfair trade agreements negotiated by several of my far less intelligent and skilled predecessors.  As you know, to alleviate this imbalance, I imposed tariffs of some products we trade with that county.  President Xi then responded by imposing tariffs on some American products, and ramping up soy bean production, which has had an impact on America’s soy farmers. Soon this will change.

The way I see it, an attack on our agriculture industry is an attack on my future votes.  This cannot stand.  So, now it’s time to hit them where it hurts.  It’s time to start making an economic impact on the things China holds dear.

At 5:35AM this morning — right after my normal tweeting time — I signed an executive order placing very tough economic sanctions on all P.F. Chang’s restaurants.

This was a very difficult decision, especially since I will dearly miss snacking on Dim Sum while waiting for my masterfully prepared plate of Singapore Black Pepper Chicken.  However, being the true patriot I am, I was willing to make this sacrifice for you — The American people.  President Xi will be nearly helpless to retaliate in the China trade war once he is no longer able to influence our economy with soul nourishing Vietnamese Chocolate Lava Cakes, and Banana Spring rolls.

I know that this maneuver is drastic, but we are in a dire situation, and I refuse to give even one inch of concession to a country which manipulates its currency to devalue the American dollar.

To President Xi Jinping, I have a simple message:

Give up your stubborn retaliation, and come to the negotiating table.  Quit acting like we owe you money or something, and let’s come up with a mutually beneficial trade agreement.  I look forward to the day when we can return P.F. Chang’s to full operation, and we can discuss this like gentlemen over a few Asian Pear Mojitos, in true Chinese tradition.

Thank you,

Donald J. Trump
President of the United States of America

We have reached out to P.F. Chang’s Headquarters in Scottsdale, Arizona for a response, but they have not yet made an official comment on this matter.  NewsWerthy will keep you posted as more information becomes available.

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